युवा और सक्षम

I Moved!

Fri, 24 Feb 2012 16:24:33 -0800

I’ve been MIA from the blogging world for a while. Sorry to all my faithful readers (if any of you still exist). I decided to move over to Blogspot. Here’s my new blog:

www.breadlily.blogspot.com

See you on there, and thanks for following me!

Count Your Blessings, Pt. 2

Tue, 20 Dec 2011 11:48:01 -0800

It is warfare in my womb and the baby lost. More like we lost the baby. Two miscarriages in less than a 4-month period means it’s time to let my body heal. Let go, move on. D and I have too much to look forward to, to be dwelling on the loss.

We finally set a wedding date, or maybe calling it a wedding plan is more appropriate. More announcements to come in the following months!

D and I are traveling to the Philippines, China and possibly Japan next year to visit our new families. We are also planning a long overdue trip to Hawaii. 2012 is going to be a pan-Pacific year. Let’s hope that Ring of Fire (home of the world’s 75% volcanoes) remains, for the most part, dormant…

D is graduating from Cal and I have academic goals of my own that I am working toward. This is probably the most exciting out of the three for me. Yeah, I know I’m a nerd.

The whole baby thing just wasn’t meant to be and we’ve accepted the fact that we won’t be starting a family for a few years. For now we continue to work on just us. We’re focusing on our relationship with each other, our relationships with our family and friends, our relationships to The Universe. And I’m perfectly happy with that.

Reactions to Pregnancy

Sat, 03 Dec 2011 09:14:00 -0800

The cat’s out of the bag: D and I are pregnant!

Most reactions have been very positive, as expected. It helps that everyone is happy and excited for us, because honestly, D and I are terrified. Every call, text, FB message we’ve received is so greatly appreciated. Saying we are thankful for everyone’s love and support is the biggest understatement ever.

Not everyone has been quick to give their blessings. And that’s okay, I totally get it. They’re just concerned for mine and D’s well-being, and I appreciate them for that.

Here are the two most FAQ I’ve found myself fielding from the skeptics:

Q: Did you and D plan this?
A: No this wasn’t planned, but we welcome it. I was convinced for years that I couldn’t ever bear children. So, yes, this is unexpected but that doesn’t mean we want it any less.

Q: Do you plan on getting married?
A: Yes. D and I have been engaged since April; of course we’re getting married. As far as the date goes, D wants to tie the knot before the baby comes and I would rather wait until the end of 2012 or early 2013 like we originally planned. He’s more traditional, while I am more concerned about how I look on my wedding day— even if it is just a small ceremony. Either way, we’re both really vain about it. But not stubborn. We could both go either route. Our marital status isn’t gonna affect the fact that the baby will be loved by two parents who are crazy about each other.

It's been a while...

Mon, 14 Nov 2011 12:20:05 -0800

Big changes have happened in the past two months.

I’m no longer traveling every week for work, which took some getting used to. I hadn’t stayed home for more than a weekend without getting called into work in a different state for months, so not having a suitcase packed and ready for me to roll out the door at any given moment made me very, VERY anxious.

The reason why I stopped traveling was because my former employer laid me off. I was extremely embarrassed (still am), even though I know that very competent and qualified people get laid off all the time. It helps that two of my direct boss men were angered and fought to have me stay on board, and even tried to negotiate with the client to get them to hire me. At the end of the day, however, I chose not to stay with my team because moving to Colorado is not an option for me—even for more than twice the pay I got at Dell.

I chose not to write the past two months because I wanted to break away from the virtual world for a bit and reflect more privately. I’m also trying to figure out what direction I want this blog to go to. Should I pick a theme or focus? What side(s) of me do I want to show to other netizens? Is tumblr the best host for my blog? Am I thinking too much about this? Probably. I just don’t want my identity to be tied to bored suburban wives who talk mainly about petty things like knitting, makeup hauls and yoga.

Nineteen years ago I touched my mother’s belly and...

Mon, 05 Sep 2011 10:45:00 -0700

Nineteen years ago I touched my mother’s belly and wished for a baby sister, even though everyone was convinced you were a boy. Our telepathic connection worked even back when you were in the womb. You listened to your até, came out a girl and we have been reading each other’s minds ever since. We may have butted heads and even gotten into some serious battles—no, I mean straight up WARFARE in the G household—but the truth remains: You’re the closest thing I’ll ever have to a twin, and my Ultimate Best Friend For Life. I love you!

Happy Birthday, Paola!!

(P.S. Sorry for the bad picture quality. I dug this up from my super old PhotoBucket and will upload a better one when I get a chance.)

Drunk Old Bastard

Sat, 03 Sep 2011 09:24:00 -0700

By the end of each work week I am usually tired and incredibly homesick. Yeah, living in a full-service hotel and expensing all my meals is nice, but nothing beats coming home to family and friends. That is why by Thursday I’m in high spirits because I know I get to fly back to the Bay. Nothing in the world can keep my excitement down from blowing through the roof with guns smoke and lots confetti.

Well, almost nothing.

Recently on a flight back home the man sitting next to me on the plane struck up a conversation with me. He asked me about the book I was reading at the time (Irving Stone’s The Agony and the Ecstasy), and we got into a great conversation about philosophers of the past. It was nice. This guy seemed pretty harmless as he sipped on his end-of-the-week whiskey. He even gave me some great book suggestions.

By his second whiskey, he started asking more about me. The usual small talk with an older man ensued. This is how it goes:

What’s your name? Maxine (totally NOT my name).
Where are you from, Maxine? California.
No, I mean where are you FROM? What is your nationality? I’m FROM California, born and raised, so I’m American… My parents are from the Philippines, if that’s what you’re asking.

At this, men usually say in a dreamy voice, “Ohh, I once knew a Filipina….” Sometimes they’ll even go further to say, “She broke my heart” or “What a firecracker, she was!” I’ll joke and say, “Yeah, us Filipinas are somethin’ else!”, but inside my head it’s, “Ew. Get away from me. I’m not going to redeem your broken heart and you’ll never know the fiery side to me!” Sigh… Old men. Most of them are pervs who haven’t gotten laid by their wives in years because they are such sickos.

Anyway, by the time this old man was at his third glass things got REALLY interesting. He started interrogating me about my love life. I told him I was happily engaged to a tall, dark handsome buff man who would beat up any guy who tried to get at me. To anybody else, this means back off she’s taken and her man will fuck you up. But no. He pressed on, asking more about my love life and inching toward me until finally, he asked what I’m sure he wanted to know all night long. In his slurry and heavily accented speech, the old man asked:

Are you a virgin? If not, have you had sex with your fiance?

Whoa! Did a total stranger just ask me that?? SECURITY!!!

It didn’t end pretty.

When I told D about the man, his eyes darted around the terminal asking what he looks like so he could get all gangsta on him and beat his disrespectful ass up. Lucky for the old man, he was no where in sight. As for me, I’ve made sure to avoid talking to strange old men who’ve had more than 2 drinks. I should have seen this coming. Dammit, I’m too nice sometimes…

Count Your Blessings

Tue, 30 Aug 2011 15:19:00 -0700

Resting my head on my mom’s shoulders and hands on my once-pregnant belly during a slow song at a rock concert held between two huge boulders.

Sour cream and poppy seed ice cream at an old-fashioned candy shoppe in a quaint little historic mining town.

The rare genuineness of an ER doctor who isn’t jaded by however many miscarriages she’s seen.

FaceTime with my sister and nephew while I am grieving 1,300 miles away.

A care package delivered by my boss.

Surprise visit from D and home-cooked meals in an otherwise empty hotel room.

D holding my hand during a very uncomfortable and heartbreaking Ob-Gyn visit.

Long car rides winding through the mountains.

Support calls from (former and existing) co-workers who step in as family while I am miles away from my own.

Laughing all through the night over poop jokes with my best friend of 16 years. Yes, we are (turning) 25 this year.

Flying over the Bay Area in anticipation of landing.

My darling nephew cooing and grunting at me like I know what he’s saying.

Morning runs by the lake at sunrise.

————————————————————————————-

You wouldn’t have guessed it but the past month hasn’t been all that kind to me. I have been able to avoid a nervous breakdown due to all of the above. Thank you to my mom, sister, Teddy Bear, eLT, my team at work, KElwood, Kim and Tara for all your love and support. My positivity and strength to keep on stem from you.

And most especially, my wonderful hub-to-be, D. We gonna take over the world someday. Be ready and on your game. Aw, shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiet.

For D’s birthday I had the awesome idea of taking a square...

Sun, 21 Aug 2011 20:15:00 -0700

For D’s birthday I had the awesome idea of taking a square of his favorite key-lime Ciaobella gelato ice cream sandwich and sticking it with 28 candles. You know, the long skinny ones that sparkle an annoy you because no matter how many times you blow ‘em out they reignite and you end up with not just birthday cake, but ash and wax and spit too! Yum!

My strategy for lighting all these candles was to use an extra one and light them from the inside out. By the fifth candle, the one I was using got as limp and disappointing as an investment banker on coke who’s stocks just crashed. It wasn’t looking as pretty as I imagined it in my head. After lighting all the candles, half of them were already just stubs. The rest of them started leaning into one another causing some of the flames to join into one huge one.

This was a fire hazard, foshizzle. But, by God, NOTHING was gonna get in the way between singing happy birthday to my man whilst presenting him with a cute ass cake. Nothing.

So I shut off all the lights. Carried the cake to D and started singing.

“Happy birthday to youuu! Happy birthday to youu! Happy biirthd—Oh, God, the flames are getting bigger, MAKE A WISH AND BLOW THAT SHIT OUT!!!!”

I am so classy.

I really wanted to get a shot of D blowing out his birthday candles. No, actually I really wanted to get a picture of my adorbs birthday cake idea, but we were both frantically trying to blow out those goddamn tricky candles from fear we’d set off the fire alarm/sprinklers on the entire floor of the hotel. Man! I wish I caught that, too. Oh well.

I guess this picture of burnt out candles, graham cracker crumbs and splattered wax will do until next year.

Happy birthday, honey!

Pseudo-Foodie

Thu, 11 Aug 2011 19:21:00 -0700

The other day a friend of mine called me out of the blue.

C: Hey, I’m at the grocery store and I wanted to get your opinion on what kind of olives would go with my pasta dish?
Me: Well, hello to you, too!
C: Haha, sorry! I’ve just never cooked with olives before and I want to know which goes best with a red sauce.
Me: What type of olives do you usually eat?
C: Umm… black olives on my pizza?
Me: Hmm. If you want to add a little kick to your pasta sauce, go with Kalamata olives. The green ones won’t go too well. They’re a little salty and sour.
C: Okay, thanks! Should I get them pitted? What does that mean?
Me: Do you want to cut the seeds out of them?
C: Olives have seeds?
Me: Get the pitted ones.

A few weeks ago, my BFFAE and I were cooking dinner together. She had brought a copy of The Flavor Bible, which sparked a discussion about how the Chinese use cinnamon in savory dishes as opposed to sweet desserts like Americans do. I suggested we add the slightest dash of cinnamon in our meat sauce. So we did. The cinnamon completely changed the flavor of the sauce in the best way possible. It came out pretty amazing. A few days later, BFFAE called me up to tell me that I had ignited a cinnamon obsession within her. Neat.

People have been coming to me lately with their culinary quandaries, hoping I’d point them in the right direction when it comes to ingredients or restaurant choices. It’s really strange. I don’t consider myself a foodie by any means. I just enjoy food. Lots of it. It’s also kinda cool. I’m always flattered when someone respects my opinion on something as important as good food, and I’m always happy to oblige.

I wasn’t always interested in food. In fact, I used to be afraid of it. Most of my college years were spent dodging calories and sticking to a strict fitness regimen to fit into my size double 0s. That is, until I found ribeye steaks, toro (fatty tuna), real beer, real cheese, real wine… real food. My life has changed. For the better, I think. I enjoy it a hell of a lot better. Most importantly, my friends enjoy my company more. I remember how uncomfortable they felt eating around me when I had my typical salad whilst preaching about how fried foods are the devil. God, I was such a bitch. I would’ve hated me.

Anyway, I encourage everyone who reads this blog to try a new food. Experiment a little. Be adventurous. Indulge yourself (but know your limits). It just might change your life for good.

Oh, and feel free to ask me anything!

Positivity

Wed, 10 Aug 2011 20:26:59 -0700

Lately my blog posts have been very criticism-heavy (read: full of complaints). While I like to think myself a very discerning person, I am very capable to use it toward calling out the good as well as the not-so-good. So let me take the time to ensure you, my faithful readers, that my life is not driven by misery and disgust.

Even though I am homesick, living in the Denver for the next umpteen months is kinda exciting! I’m renting a fully-furnished luxury suite at this really awesome hotel with great amenities—state-of-the-art gym, salt water pool, complimentary breakfast 7 days a week, happy hour M-Th, and I don’t even have to make my bed everyday. Um, awesome!

I’ve convinced people to come and visit me on some weekends I’m here, so I’ll be exploring Colorado’s beauty. I predict I’ll fall in love with this state if I haven’t already. This weekend’s agenda: John Butler Trio at the Red Rock Amphitheater, vin et hors d’oeurves on an historic train ride up the Colorado mountains, Denver zoo, Denver museum (I heard great things!) and the downtown botanical garden.

Upcoming trips within the next 2 months: New Jersey (and possibly NYC/Manhattan) and Tennessee! We’ll be conducting project management workshops to help get our customer’s health care IT projects underway and through to implementation. I am hoping that I’d be able to pay visits to their hospitals/clinics as well. Obviously, I am so excited since I’ve never been to either state. My super awesome manager and I have already spotted a few restaurants and local dishes we want to try. We are fatties like that.

Soo, all that to say: I hope you don’t think I’m a negative person. I deal with adversity quite well, actually. Even more, I hope you don’t pity me. That would be awful.

Sunday Sadness

Sun, 07 Aug 2011 21:48:31 -0700

In my previous post I said that waiting in line at airport security is the worst part of my week. I take that back. The worst part of the week is Sunday night when I have to excuse myself from dinner early so I can pack up and get to bed early so I can catch my 6am flight to work.

This Sunday is no exception, and it’s worse because I’ll be gone for 3 weeks so I’ll miss D’s birthday. He tells me it’s not a big deal because he’ll be busy with the MCAT anyway. I tried convincing him to let me buy him a ticket after his test is over, but he’d rather I save my money for a bigger trip we are planning for December.

I’m also sad I won’t see my nephew until his christening. He changes so much when I’m gone for only a week, he’s gonna be so different when I come back in three.

Sigh. I know it’s not the end of the world and it isn’t even THAT long.

I should be looking forward to this instead of dreading it. I’ll be spending the weekends exploring Colorado’s beauty with my mom and BFFAE (on separate weekends). I’ll most likely get out into the social scene and make friends with the locals.

I probably just don’t want to work while I’m there. The excitement of a new job has worn off and I’ve come to realize that I’m not being challenged nearly enough. I find myself bored most of the time, asking for things to do. D tells me I should stop because I might tick off my manager and make them look bad. He has a point, but I can’t stand being idle at work. I need to feel like I’m doing something important. Managing budgets was important. Reminding people of what they already should know isn’t that important to me. Sorry.

I’ve been really bitchy lately, haven’t I? Oh well, I guess that’s what this blog is for…

Can somebody please send positive energy my way? I need it to get through the next three weeks.

10 Tips for Going Through the Airport Security Line

Sat, 06 Aug 2011 08:49:59 -0700

The worst part of every week for me is the day I have to fly out to work and go through security. Here are some dos and don’ts for getting through security:

1) Don’t wear lots of jewelry. We’re going for efficiency here, not a fashion statement. Even if you do look nice with your drop earrings and half a dozen necklaces and bangles all the way up to your elbow, holding up security lines so you can take off your little trinkets is not classy at all.

2) Don’t wear any kind of footwear that is difficult to take off/put on. I have seen grown people actually sit on the ground in line to take off their shoes. This holds up the line, obviously. If your shoes can’t easily slip on and off you’re feet

3) Don’t bring your pillow. Why, people? It’s just another thing to carry and ties up your hands while you’re trying to get shit out of your bags and through the x-ray. Also, do you know how many germs your pillow is picking up when you set it down on any kind of surface at the airport? And you sleep with all those germs feasting on your face? Ew. You’re gross.

4) Read up on what you can and cannot bring through security beforehand. If you don’t, read the damn sign. At the start of every security line there is a sign that tells you what you can and cannot bring with you on the plane. Please make sure that you get rid of items that don’t comply and please don’t try to argue with security that this item is acceptable. They’re not here for customer service.

5) While traveling with kids, it’s okay to let them be a little rambunctious while standing in line. They’re just bored and trying to entertain themselves. You don’t have to scream and yell at them whenever they step 2ft away from you. It usually doesn’t work, if you haven’t noticed by now. Here’s another tip: If your child is old enough to know how to pick up after their toys, they can probably help get their own stuff through security if you just show them how. Kids like being involved and if you delegate tasks to them, they’re usually happy to do it as long as they still trust you (that’s why you shouldn’t scream at them for no apparent reason) and feel like they are contributing. Trust me, I have experience in taking a group of children to crowded, public places.

6) Stay off your cell phone while you’re putting your shit through. I mean, really? Is it THAT important? Probably not.

7) Don’t ask to cut in line, then complain out loud to everyone behind you and call 3 people just to bitch about it when you get a firm “NO”. No one cares.

8) If there is a person in front of you who is taking a while to get their shit out and the line is moving, it’s okay to push their stuff along the line. They’ll probably thank you.

9) Pack as lightly as possible. Less stuff means less time to go through security. I’m pretty sure you don’t need an entire trunk for 1 week, let alone 1 weekend. If you’re that fancy, why didn’t you just take a private jet to your destination?

10) Have your boarding pass and ID ready for security. You will piss everyone off if you stand there fumbling through your bag looking for something you know you should’ve already had out.

Ugh, I am already dreading this weekend’s flight out to Denver…

Eating Animals

Tue, 02 Aug 2011 21:02:28 -0700

Tonight I am finally putting down Eating Animals by Jonathan Safran Foer. I usually read every book I pick up cover-to-cover even if it isn’t any good. I can deal with a sucky plot, annoying characters, bad storytelling or even the overuse of different fonts and font sizes. I like finishing what I start. But after 3 weeks of forcing my way through a 250-page book that would usually only take me an hour and thirty to read, I feel no remorse putting down this book.

Why? Because this book disgusts me. No, it isn’t because Foer talks about cruelty and torture against the animals we eat. It isn’t that he describes the inhumane and unsanitary slaughtering of pigs. It isn’t the crazy statements he makes (At one point Foer claims that feeding a farm animal nowadays equates to feeding a child to obesity by granola bars alone. I actually believe him on this one). What I DESPISE Foer for is that he passes scathing judgment against the non-factory farmers who try to pave the way for building a market for ethically farmed animals. He pretty much lets the farmer write 2-4 pages on why they believe ethical farming is the direction America should be going toward, then in the next 1.5 pages he criticizes their person instead of their educated reasoning. For example, Foer implies that an ethical butcher (meaning he stunguns instead of tortures an animal before killing) must not have a heart because he pronounces shih tzu like “SHIT su”, or that the co-owner of Niman Ranch is a hypocrite because she chooses not to eat the cattle she helps raise, or that Smithfield’s former CEO is a crook simply because his last name is pronounced “looter”. Come on, now. Give me a real reason why eating meat from a respectable ranch is wrong. Oh, you can’t because you’re a sanctimonious prick who is an even bigger hypocrite than Niman Ranch’s co-owner because you claim to be a vegetarian but you absolutely loove bacon?

I can’t believe this book made any kind of best seller list… but then again, Angels & Demons did too, and that was one of the worst books I’ve ever read. I’m even more disappointed that Natalie Portman claims this book changed her life (Come on, Nat, you’ve much better taste than that, surely).

If it isn’t obvious by now, I do not recommend Foer or any of his works for that matter. There are plenty of books like Eating Animals that are of of the same genre and provide much more educated view into the world of factory farming vs. ethical farming. I hear Michal Pollan is good. I’ll stop by the bookstore and see if there are any more copies of his books.

In the meantime, I picked up Irving Stone’s The Agony and Ecstasy. I recently read Lust for Life, and I was so touched by the way Stone told Van Gogh’s story I even cried. And I don’t cry (publicly). Changed my life and turned me into a post-impressionist fan.

Anywho, it’s time for bedtime reading. Woohoo, can’t wait!

What book are YOU currently reading?

Faith-Based Orgs

Tue, 26 Jul 2011 21:32:00 -0700

The company I consult for is considered a large faith-based health care organization, which is really just a euphemism to express that they are some form of Christian (Come on, do you really think large Muslim, Hindu or even Santaria-based hospital organizations in America would be as profitable?) In this case, they are Catholic.

Last time I was part of a Catholic organization was in middle school, where girls competed over who could hike their skirts up the highest without getting sent to the pedophilic principal, and boys were incredibly awkward (going through puberty and all), spending their leisure time playing CYO basketball and/or serving as altar boys on the weekend. It isn’t a time I look back on with fond memories. Catholic school did, however, teach me how to behave as a lady when, in reality, I’m just as wild and crazy as the next deviant.

This company is no different. The women here frequently break dress code and the men are not so much awkward as they are priest-like. Admittedly, I feel a strange sense of cultural connection. I totally get their culture. It’s like the Catholic schoolgirl in me never left. Or maybe it’s just the tainted glass windows, crosses, and pictures of saints everywhere.

Company culture is something us consultants have to always be mindful of whenever client-facing, meaning try to fit in as much as possible and don’t stick out like a sore thumb. For this client, that means no use of any “violent words”; i.e. DOT points instead of BULLET points, DASHING T’s instead of CROSSING T’s, COACHING OPPORTUNITIES instead of EVALUATIONS, etc. Weird. But, okay, I get it. Ephesians 4:29. Thank you, years and years of Bible study!

The most difficult restriction my consulting team has had so far is dealing with Catholic guilt that obviously perpetuates through the halls. A couple of months ago, KPMG performed an audit and found a bunch of things wrong with their PLC. Faith-based org subsequently hired my team to help fix the problems. I get the sense that, while they fully intend on correcting their mistakes, there hasn’t yet been a full commitment to changing the way they run things. It’s like they just came out of confession with a priest (KPMG), and expect to only say a few Hail Mary’s as “punishment for their sins” when they really need to “repent” by fully accepting the Lord as their Savior (my company).* Hah!

I’d be really interested to see how this engagement pans out.

————————————

*Before all you religious fanatics accuse me of taking the Lord’s name in vain, I’m sorry, all right? Don’t get offended.

P.S. As stated in the disclaimer to the right, ALL IDENTIFYING INFORMATION HAS BEEN CHANGED TO PROTECT MY CLIENT AND COMPANY.

I Lost My Stylist to my BF, Pt. 2

Sun, 24 Jul 2011 22:01:05 -0700

Okay, maybe not my stylist, but a particular skin consultant at Kiehl’s.

I’m a huge fan of Kiehl’s. I trust their brand, and I trust the people who work there. D and I are regulars at the San Jose store, so whenever we come in to stock up they always recognize us. Unless, of course, they’re new.

Earlier today, while we were getting our haul rung up by a new Kiehl’s guy who obviously had the hots for D, he stopped mid-transaction to ask if we were brother and sister. D wrapped his arm around me and answered, “No, she’s my fiancee.”

To this, the new guy looked me up and down with a curled upper lip, then quickly lit up and exclaimed, “OMG, you’re SO lucky!!”.

You’re damn right I’m lucky. Now, stop looking, ho!

Just kidding. I didn’t say or even think that. What I thought was how I need to avoid this guy from now on for fear that he might sabotage me and my skin. Vain and a little paranoid? I don’t care. My skin may be problematic, but it’s my life!

Chinese Man Dentist

Sun, 24 Jul 2011 11:51:00 -0700

My dentist for most of my life is a bright, bubbly woman who goes the extra mile to make her patients feel at ease. Her staff is equally amazing with excellent teamwork. When I first started seeing her, I couldn’t tell who was the dentist and who was the dental assistant. She’s my family dentist. I don’t just mean that my parents and sibs go to her; my aunts, uncles and all my cousins do, too.

Anyway, D has been raving about his new dentist and has been encouraging me to go. This guy graduated with top honors at NYU’s dental school, did research with some world-renowned dental implantologist and was an assistant professor at said school. My first suspicion is: why did he choose to open up his own clinic vs. getting tenure at NYU?? Hmm, very curious… Anyway, he did great work with D’s dents, so I thought I’d try out his clinic and see what all the buzz was about.

I had the usual cleaning, with a consultation for wisdom teeth removal and told him that I have trouble with getting lockjaw sometimes when I eat. When I’m stressed, I tend to clench my teeth which puts some strain on the jaw. It was becoming a problem, and maybe even causing my jawline to become a little crooked.

I expected him to give me some advice on how I could relieve the pain whenever it comes up. Instead, he brought up that D was having the same problem and that whenever it happens to him I should make sure that I tend to his needs by massaging his jaw joints and reminding him to take ibuprofen if it gets really bad.

…

Uh, okay? This was my appointment, not D’s. Sure, I can apply all of the above to myself but I don’t need consultation on how to be a good girlfriend. WTF. I’m paying you to give me your professional advice and instead you talk about someone else’s problems.

I admit this is a little far-fetched but, what if D and I had chosen to NOT share any medically related ailments with one another? He totally just violated HIPAA. This isn’t as bad as a list of his other patients displayed on a screen hanging right above me as I sat in the room waiting for him.

The thing I found most troubling was that he didn’t treat his staff very nicely. They were all young Chinese women, and every time they did something wrong he’d give them a condescending glare and shake his head. To this, the dental assistant would smile nervously and continue to do their work without any kind of constructive coaching. They were scared of him, and it made me wonder if I should be, too.

For the most part, Dr. L was nice to me and answered all of my questions. Simply put, he’s good at what he does. He’s just a huge asshole.

After my appointment, I told D what happened. He thinks it’s just a cultural difference. He says Dr. L is just a really traditional Chinese guy, which means he’s an asshole (D’s words, not mine!). Dr. L probably thinks I’m just some California bimbo who doesn’t know how to treat a man right, so he thought he was doing me a favor by telling me what I should do for D when he’s in pain. Like I need relationships advice from a guy who is obviously bitter at his choice of profession. I guess in their culture, coming off as a bitter asshole is permissible as long as you have the right credentials and do decent work.

Ok, I get that. Understandable. Just don’t expect me to come back. I, for one, like knowing that my dentist has compassion for his staff and patients. I also like knowing that my dentist is vested in my dental health as well as my partner’s. Thanks, but no thanks.

In a previous life I was a performer. My whole life was...

Wed, 20 Jul 2011 21:20:00 -0700

In a previous life I was a performer. My whole life was scheduled around voice lessons and dance classes. Time was measured not by months or weeks but by recitals, performances and competitions. The goal of each day was to squeeze in as much practice as possible. It was a good life.

Unfortunately, life happened. The more bills I had to pay, the more I had to work, the less time I could commit to my art.

After four years of being inactive, here’s the best I could do. It’s also a jazz song, which is a genre I’m not very good at. In college I specialized in chamber music, German lieder and Italian arias, so sorry if my rendition of Skylark is lacking dissonance and crazy, off the chart runs. Please don’t be harsh!

An Interesting Week So Far... And It's Only Tuesday

Tue, 19 Jul 2011 20:30:00 -0700

Yesterday I was supposed to fly to Denver for my first day at the new client site. I arrived at the airport very early, but missed my flight due to having to wait in line for 2 hours just to be told that my flight was canceled and there were no more available spots to Denver unless you want to pay over $1k. F that. To make matters worse, the entire terminal was one huge clusterfuck of frazzled United Airway employees and frustrated passengers. The lady behind me bitched non-stop for an entire hour to the rest of the line behind her and even called 3 people on her cell phone to tell them how selfish I was because I wouldn’t let her cut in line. Apparently, she was about to miss her flight. So was I, I told her. Why would I give up my spot in line if we were both in the same situation? It wouldn’t have made a difference anyway. We were so far back in line a 10-minute wait would not have made a difference.This didn’t shut her up. She even had the nerve to tell me that she wishes that no one help me if I ever really needed it. To this comment, I wanted to bite her head off and tell her how much of dumbass she made herself look like, but I am a lady and have more class than to stoop to her level. So I just laughed. I think this angered her more.

After an unsuccessful rally at SFO, I returned home to a comforting boyfriend who took me shopping and spent the whole afternoon helping me book a hotel room (Microsoft convention this week shut down the whole city!), a good phone conversation with my BFFAE and dinner with another BFF.

I ended up flying into DEN this morning, which was kind of rough. I’m so spoiled after flying AA and Virgin America everywhere that United doesn’t even stand a chance. After I left the confusing, poorly designed, arcadesque airport I was greeted by my zippy little rental Fiat 500 that I have so enjoyed driving thus far—especially with the big open sky and Colorado Rockies in the background. It’s breathtakingly beautiful here.

After work I drove through downtown Denver to get a feel for the city and what it’s all about, and got dinner at Biker Jim’s which was made famous thanks to Anthony Bourdain on No Reservations. Full off of duck cilantro dog, I am no retired in my hotel room ready to call it a night.

I hope the rest of this week will be just as exciting as the past 48 hours.

Hello Corporate World. We Meet Again. In Denver.

Sun, 17 Jul 2011 11:27:05 -0700

This past Wednesday I was notified by one of my managers that I’ve been assigned to a different project with a new client. It’s a similarly-sized healthcare company as the one I consulted for in Dallas. The major difference is the environment there “is like heaven compared to [old company name]”. The people I will be working with love to say that, and I can understand why. Even after more than a year since leaving the old client, they love to claim independence from that place. It was the most hostile environment they’ve ever worked in. I guess they’ve never worked at an accounting department for a non-profit company in media. But then again, I’d work with crackhead journalists asking for an advance every non-pay week over corporate monkeys with ridiculously overblown egos any day.

I’m really happy with the team I’ll be working with at the new client’s headquarters in Denver. I’ve worked with them before and they are a fun group. The only thing I am not too excited about is meeting the executive leaders. I hope they are nothing like the ones I’ve met in Dallas. I also hope there aren’t too many competing vendors. I don’t know if I can take backstabbing team members any longer.

My flight leaves early tomorrow morning, so I must put on the business suit and winning smile again after 2 weeks of lounging around in my workout clothes all day. I’m pretty excited about all the beer and local eats in Denver. I’ll be sure to soak up the culture there. I’m also trying to convince D to stay with me one weekend to take his mind off the MCAT for a couple of days. Actually, I’ll take anybody who’ll come with. Any takers out there? Friends only, please!

I Lost My Stylist to My BF

Sun, 17 Jul 2011 10:36:00 -0700

For the past however long I’ve known him (we met in 2007) D has been bald. To be honest, tanned bald guys usually aren’t my thing so I was pretty surprised at myself when I chose to overlook those things when we started dating. It must have been his buff body, 6’ stature and über handsome face that got to me. He never looks bad. Even when he doesn’t shower or shave for 2 days and bums around in sweats, he still turns all the girlies’ heads and gets hit on wherever he goes. It just isn’t fair. I wish I looked that good at all times.

Anyway, I had grown used to and even loved the fact that he was bald but still curious to see him with shoulder-length hair, so I asked him to grow it out for me 3-4 months ago. He’s been sporting a hat ever since and his hair had grown so long, strands have been poking out to the side. Even though he’s sexy as ever, D was starting to look messy for once.

Yesterday I introduced him to the salon where I go to just get trims (I have one for trims, another for color/styled cuts). I made 3 back to back appointments and told D to take the first slot so I could pick up my little sister from piano lessons. When I arrived, my stylist, a big gay man with surprisingly nimble hands, was working his magic and made D look the best he’s ever looked. Later that day, D and I compared our experiences at the salon. The stylist, he told me, took his time and was very talkative. I was surprised because by the time he got to me, he didn’t even wash my hair like usual and he was rougher with his hands. When I tried to initiate conversation, he gave me short answers. Oh, and my haircut came out just okay. I wasn’t smiling as big as normal. When we left, he even walked D out himself.

What does this tell me? My stylist has a crush on my boyfriend and now I’m not sure if I can trust my stylist to give me a good cut ever again. One thing’s for sure: I can never bring D with me ever again! Great. I guess I should’ve seen this coming.